Deciding to decline, or deciding to wait and see?

balanceI recently and unexpectedly reconnected with a past midwifery client, ‘Jenna’, who allowed me to share elements of her care story in The New Midwifery a few years ago.  Jenna was, of course a pseudonym and both she and her partner ‘Dev’ (who, for reasons that Jenna and I never quite got to the bottom of, insisted on being named after the keeper of the corner shop in a certain British soap opera!) had been through a journey of decision-making around so-called post-term pregnancy.

It was in writing about Jenna and Dev’s story that I first started paying attention to the importance of being really clear about what is being decided when decisions are made.  Because the nature of my practice (and, to be honest, my ideology, which underpins my practice) means that I have worked with many couples who have decided to decline certain interventions which are offered routinely at a particular point.  I’m talking about things like induction of labour, vitamin K, antenatal (and sometimes postnatal) anti-D and managed third stage, all of which I have ended up researching and writing about extensively, generally because I have been inspired to do so by these women.

But there is an important nuance here, which I think is sometimes missed.  Because in almost every case, these women and their families are not actually declining the intervention completely; they are saying that they do not want to have it routinely, or unless they need it.

While Jenna and Dev decided to decline routine induction of Jenna’s labour, for instance, I know they would have been very open to considering it if the results of our ‘watchful waiting’ had suggested that this might be indicated.  By the same token, many of the parents I know who have declined routine vitamin K would have been more than happy to have it if their baby showed any sign of needing it in their first few days of life (and you can find out more about vitamin K here).  I have worked with a woman who declined routine antenatal anti-D but who called me and asked for it after she had been in a minor traffic accident in which her airbag deployed (and so, because she had therefore experienced a potentially sensitising event she decided that anti-D would be advisable) and I have cared for several women who had decided to have a physiological placental birth rather than a managed third stage but who were more than happy to have an oxytocic when they lost more blood than average.

It’s not always about a yes/no, accept/decline dichotomy.  Often, there is a middle ground, and this middle ground is about making decisions as and about an individual within their own context and according to need, rather than routinely.  We’ve seen a positive shift – at least in some circles – from using the word ‘refuse’ (which is, let’s face it, a bit confrontational) to using the word ‘decline’.  Wouldn’t it be great if we could take the next step and expand the discussion and our vocabulary further to indicate that many of those who are seen by some as declining intervention are actually actively seeking individualised care which might well include deciding to have those very same interventions, but on a deployed-when-needed rather than routine basis?

3 comments for “Deciding to decline, or deciding to wait and see?

  1. Nancy Beyda
    March 18, 2014 at 6:57 am

    Yes – language is so important and shapes experience

  2. March 18, 2014 at 1:05 pm

    Often, there is a middle ground, and this middle ground is about making decisions as and about an individual within their own context and according to need, rather than routinely.

    So so sew true!

  3. lesley Price
    March 19, 2014 at 8:44 am

    Agree.Decline can often be interpreted by some staff as ‘difficult’ woman or couple when in fact it usually means more time and more consideration of options and choices as the pregnancy,labour and birth unfold.I have found this with labouring home birth women who have ticked or wrote on the birth plan for syntometrine at 38weeks .

    Lesley Price

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